Food Flavored Album Review: Recharge by the Tambo Rays

The first time I experienced Larabars was at the finish line of a half marathon. The company sent someone to hand out samples. I grabbed a handful, scarfed them down, remember liking them and then moved on. Years later, those little bars began showing up in grocery stores. Every time I thought about purchasing a box, I'd look at the price and head the other direction. Those bars, in all their plant based and gluten free glory, were definitely not cheap. To combat the drain on my wallet, I did what most adventurous kitchen types would do, I started making my own version..

Then Larabar brought out a new line of products called Larabar bites. These were essentially the bars rolled into truffle like bites. So, I started making them too. Recently I've become enamored with the double chocolate brownie bites. These bites consist of just six ingredients: dates, cocoa, dark chocolate chips, coconut flour, almonds and sea salt. In my kitchen I added a seventh, coconut shreds. To make the bites just stuff all these ingredients into a food processor and pulse until they become tiny bits. Then add a little water, pulse a few more times and voila, start rolling chocolate snowballs. While working out the logistics of this recipe, I listened to the new Tambo Rays EP, Recharge (released on July 17th via OIM Records). Both the bites and the Tambo Rays EP had a lot in common.

Recharge kicks off with the upbeat, sun soaked, pop rock of "Yes and No." According to the band it is a song about letting go of old habits, the uncertainty of wandering through new territory and confronting the difficulties that arise from leaving behind the safety net of the status quo. Hmm...sun soaked, letting go of the status quo, releasing old habits. Sounds a bit like coconut flour if you ask me. Coconut flour is born and bred from a fruit that hangs out on a tree that is found in tropical, sun soaked climates. In the bites that I created, the coconut flour took the place of traditional flour. It can be tough to let go of white flour, and it certainly is the road less traveled, but sometimes it can be so worth it. These bites were one of those times.



Recharge's second track, "Always Down" embraces the same sort of glimmering pop as "Yes and No" but the lyrics hint at something a bit more melancholy. "Always Down" was written about being there and supporting a friend who is dealing with some dark days. The necessary support is most apparent in the lines "And I'll always be there for you, situations unknown, and I'll always be there for you, to take you where you want to go to." These lines are ambiguous in the sense that they allow the darkness to remain unnamed. When a friend says they need you, it doesn't really matter what the situation is, you go. And if they need you to take them somewhere, again, the destination isn't relevant, you drive until they are satisfied. Satisfaction, underlying darkness. Not only do these words describe, "Always Down" but they could just as easily represent the chocolate chips and cocoa powder found in this recipe.



"Wrong Turn" takes the adage go big or go home and makes it reality. This isn't just a pop song. It is a sonic, tilt-a-whirl of wavy synths, moody percussion and sexy guitars. These elements provide a stylized base to prop up Sara DaMert's emotive lyrics. "Wrong Turn" is the second most evocative track on Recharge. Long after the EP fades to silence, the lines and sounds of "Wrong Turn" remain in your brain like little earworms of enthrallment. The Medjool dates used for these bites are every bit as enthralling, moody and evocative as "Wrong Turn." Medjools, because of their elevated status in the date world are often referred to as kings, diamonds or crown jewels. Not sure you can get more enthralling than that. They have a rich, sweet taste that brings to mind differing food moods like caramel, honey or cinnamon.



What ties these chocolate bites together is the almonds. The "almonds" of Recharge is the closer, "Get It Right Now." This track is the most evocative of the lot because it combines aspects of each of the previous tracks. "Get It Right Now" features some of the same sonic elements as "Wrong Turn," the upbeat, sun soaked pop of "Yes and No" and the underlying melancholy of "Always Down." Its chorus seems to say that despite the fact that you are going through or have previously gone through some tough moments, time will heal those wounds ("To fall in love it just takes time"). Same with those pesky almonds. Pulse a bit and try to roll these bites and you'll be met with the tough almond exterior. But give it some time, pulse a bit more and you'll wind up with an easily moldable nutty treat.



Recharge by the Tambo Rays and Double Chocolate Brownie Bites have a number of things in common. Ultimately what stands out is the staying power of each. This staying power is created in both of these by combining catchy immediacy with a subtle and brilliant nuance.

Artist's Cookbook: What's Cooking With Swine Tax?

Vince Lisle likes to cook Italian food. Well, maybe likes isn't strong enough of a word. Vince Lisle is passionate about cooking Italian food. He is so passionate about it that every day for two years he would cook (and eat) a different dish of risotto or pasta. He collected his favorite recipes, notes and stories about Italian cooking and published them on his blog Cibo Di Chenzo.

Aside from cooking, eating and blogging, Vince is also the lead vocalist and guitarist for Newcastle upon Tyne alternative rock trio, Swine Tax. These guys make music that is well structured and warmly laid down. Lyrically they deal with personal themes like social alienation, uncertainty in love and chronic pain (something that Vince suffers from).

Swine Tax's second single, "Brittle," is hot off the presses. The song instantly struck me as something I would be listening to on the regular. First there's Vince and his vocals. He presents the lyrics in a variety of fashions throughout the track. There's the high pitched siren, not a grating siren that is blaring right next to you, but a more restrained one shooting off in the distance. There's the hypnotic choir like sounds. And the pogoing chorus. All of these surround the frenetic verses that border on losing control but never quite do. Then there is the lyrics themselves. How the hell can you not find yourself relating (and singing along) with introspective lines like, "Please don't love me, I'm not worth it, please don't love me I don't deserve it"? Backing (and sometimes fronting) the vocals are spirited guitars which roam around distorted and garagey in places and clean shaven singer-songwriterish in others. Sometimes they shake fast, sometimes they move slow, other times they just make you wonder if the dreaminess you are experiencing is a sign that you are asleep. The song's drums play out in a similar manner. They slow down, they speed up, they hypnotize. Swine Tax's "Brittle" is indie rock at it's finest. All those changes in timing, vocal deliveries and style lead to a truly unique and scrumptious listening experience.

After blasting through "Brittle" about a dozen times, I asked Vince which of his recipes he would suggest pairing with it. He said the Pasta with Sardines, Almonds, Olives and Blood Oranges. Hmm... I thought that comparison made total sense to me. I mean you have a pasta made up of a number of distinct elements, including crunchy almonds and salty olives. Just like the music in "Brittle." Then you throw in something as stand out, complicated and subtly brilliant as a blood orange and you've got a meal that is off the charts. Or, as Vince says, "seriously scrumptious." That's the vocals and lyrics in "Brittle."

Scrumptious meal, scrumptious music.

Cook: Dried Kiwi

On a recent trip to Costco, J-Fur and I were grabbing things willy nilly and throwing them into the cart like we were on one of those grocery store game shows. One of the things that wound up finding its way home with us was a gigantic plastic container of kiwi. I average, on average, during an average week, like one kiwi eaten. J-Fur is probably further south then that, let's say 1/2 a kiwi a week. Z-Bot and Special K, don't touch any fruit that's green. This plastic container consisted of multiple pounds of kiwi (I'm talking like five or six). What the f*** was I going to do with all that kiwi?

I started doling it out at the local libraries. Psst....kid. Come here. You wanna kiwi? While I successfully dispersed some, I still had a lot left over. I put a few in a batch of kombucha. My plastic kiwi container wasn't even a quarter empty yet. I ate my weekly allotment, took a few out to play kiwi Bocce and put some over my eyes at night. More remained. I began dreaming in kiwi and tasting in kiwi and coloring in kiwi. At this point I knew I needed to put a halt to all things kiwi. There would be no kiwi pizza, salad dressing or Etsy style earrings. Enough was enough. I took the remaining kiwi, which wound up being about ten of those tiny oval shaped fuzz fruits, sliced it real thin like, tore off the outer layer and laid it out single file on a wire rack stabilized over a cookie sheet. I put the rack and cookie sheet in the oven at an extremely low temperature (170 degrees Fahrenheit) for around seven hours. Boom! Dried kiwi is served!

If you ever find yourself in the land of too much kiwi, take my advice: play some bocce, get your macular degeneration reversal swag on, then use the rest for a healthy, filling, dried snack.

Artist's Cookbook: What's Cooking With Aggressive Swans?

There is this story that was thrown around a lot during my childhood. It was the story of my Great-Great Uncle Istanbul. Istanbul used to leave church every Sunday and head straight to the lake to do some canoeing. One Sunday he took a lady friend along. The two of them rowed too close to a swan. The swan attacked, capsizing the canoe and breaking Istanbul's hand. Thanks to some quick work by his lady friend, Istanbul survived, though he never returned to the water. He sold his canoe and took up bicycling. Through this story I learned two things: when you entertain a lady in a canoe make sure she is a strong swimmer and stay away from aggressive swans.

I heeded this advice of staying away from aggressive swans until June 15th, of this year. That was when I received a Facebook message from a two-piece alternative pop band based out of Munich who called themselves Aggressive Swans. Oh wait, you thought I meant that I actually went near the wild animal swan? Ha ha, yeah, fuck that shit. Not happening.

Janko Raseta and Christopher Chlupacek, the two people who make up Aggressive Swans, are both classically trained musicians. As a band, they write music without compromises. They fuse elements of modern pop and electronica, with the spirit (and instrumentation) of the 80’s and psychedelic constructs and melodies of the 70's. Aggressive Swans further define their sound with clear riffs, vocals that are both demonstrative and memorable and lapping waves of synths. You can try the band's debut single, “Every Teardrop,” on for size at the bottom of this post.

Before we go there (although you are welcome to scroll and jump at your own pace) let's hit up the kitchen. Both Janko and Christopher are crazy about cooking. So I asked the band to share a recipe, one that possesses some of the same creative components as "Every Teardrop"? Aggressive Swans responded with one of their favorites: Aggressive Swans' Walnut, Cranberry and Blue Cheese Pasta.

Now on to the single:



Find Aggressive Swans on:

Web
Facebook
Instagram
Twitter
YouTube

Four For the Fourth: Mushroom Ceviche

Poem for America

Well America, we made it another year.
For a time there I wasn't sure you could do it what with all the people who seem to be willing to sell you to highest bidder.
But you hiked up your bootstraps,
pulled your red, white and blue bloomers tight
and drug yourself across the finish line.
You may be battered and bruised but,
at least for now, you are still standing.

In honor of you and your ever remaining hereness, I am spending the day basting a sh** ton of mushrooms in lime juice and calling it a Ceviche.

Here's the four songs that will accompany that yummy textural conundrum:

MR. RUSSIA can best be described with the following math equation: Bass + Drums - Guitar. His work is designed to show how much can be done with only a tight rhythm section and cantankerous. MR. RUSSIA's new album, Big Noise, is scheduled for release on August 18th. One of the two singles that have already reached the internet is "Bang Bang Romance." Check it:



The video:



LA-based riot pop act WASI released an EP back in May. The EP, called Coup, features a collection of songs that are about finding the power within oneself as well as within activism and community. As a staunch supporter and participant in LGBTQ/feminist causes, perhaps nothing speaks louder this 4th of July.

Here's the video for "Floor Talk." It follows a group of all female sky divers as the fall towards the ground.



Just the sounds:



Disco Fries are back and serving up a delicious summer helping of their seasoned dance music. The track, "Reckless" combines smooth drums with seamless melodies and the powerful vocals of Jared Lee. "Reckless" comes from the Fries' forthcoming EP, DF, which is due out later this summer.



And finally, the Tambo Rays. The band says about new single "Always Down": "'Always Down'" is an uplifting song written about being there for a friend going through dark times. While holding a strong, loving space, all we could do was acknowledge their sadness and bare witness, gently knowing we're always there." America definitely needs to hear that sometimes. Now is probably one of them.

Cook: Barbacoa Cauliflower

Things got a bit cheeky in the world of barbacoa this week. 

Courtney Aguilar was visiting El Rincon, a Mexican restaurant in Pflugerville,Texas, when she decided to get an order of their barbacoa. During her consumption of the barbecued meat that typically comes from the cheek or jaw of a cow she came across what she thought was teeth. She called her waitress over and the waitress, jokingly I hope, suggested that they weren't just any old teeth. What Ms. Aguilar found in her meat was a collection of "baby teeth."

After what I imagine could only have been an absolutely disgusting back and forth between the vendor who delivers El Rincon's barbacoa, the restaurant, and Ms. Aguilar, it was discovered that those weren't teeth that had made their way into the barbacoa but beef lips. Rest assured, everyone, beef lips are a "USDA-inspected product for human consumption.

Um, no thanks. I'll just save myself the hassle of finding baby teeth/beef lips/cow cheeks in my meal by making it all about cauliflower. To make it: baste a head and a half of browned cauliflower in a mixture of apple cider vinegar, garlic, cumin, oregano, salt, cloves, veggie broth, lime juice and chipotles in adobo sauce. Simmer it on low in a crockpot for about six hours. Serve it on flatbread topped with lettuce, sliced avocado and salsa. If you want to give your vegan dish the El Rincon treatment, this site has a fabulous suggestion.

Food Pairing 101: What Goes Well with the New Single From Hazel English?

"I'm Fine" is a beautifully blurry indie-pop track powered by transcendent melodies and caked in layers of Californian sunshine and redolent reverb.
-Hazel English Press Release

Did someone say cake? No? I swear I heard someone mention cake. Right now, while I was just sitting here listening to the new Hazel English single, "I'm Fine." "I'm Fine," like most of Hazel English's tracks, can best be described as sun drenched indie pop with a little bit of lo-fi on the side. Listening to her, I'm reminded a lot of Day Wave. The 25-year-old Oakland-based artist recently announced her debut 12-inch vinyl EP, Never Going Home, on House Anxiety/Marathon Artists. You'll be able to get your hands on it October 7th.

I'd pair this stunning track with some sort of sunshiney vegan cake. This vegan lemon sunshine layer cake seems like it would do just the trick.

Food Flavored Song: Apple Pie by Rafferty

When I think of Apple Pies, I think of a mouthwatering blend of sweet, tart and crisp apples swirled superbly with cinnamon, brown sugar and, perhaps, a slight sprinkling of nutmeg or lemon (if I want to get a little funky). All of that is then blanketed and baked in a golden, flakey crust. Are you picturing what I'm describing? If so, I did my job. If not, I need to head back to my local writer's guild and tell them that their crappy (and free) descriptive writing class did not work. Maybe I'll even write up a bill and charge them for my time.

Back to that picture you had. Was the setting a church bake sale? Inquiring minds and s**t. Okay, take a gigantic brain eraser and get rid of everything you just imagined, except for the church. Because Rafferty's debut single, "Apple Pie," ain't sweet. It ain't the kind of thing that you'll want to dip your finger in and taste. You won't be clamoring to lick the empty bowl. A lemon? That's child's play. "Apple Pie" is grimy and sinfully fun. It is smokey and boozy and feels like a striptease at church. The music resembles something that your garage might house after you move that old organ that your grandfather's church just sold in. There's blasting guitars that start and stop on a dime while the organ, oh that organ, pulsates in the distance. Rafferty brings the fun by incorporating a series of clap tracks, belting out an "Ahhhhh, ahhh, ahhh" chorus and taking a page from the preacher's book with an intense call and response. If he brought the fire and brimstone instead of just begging for some of that apple pie, it would seem right at home.

Nope, your typical apple pie just doesn't fit with this track. If you want a dish that epitomizes what Rafferty has going on here, you need to imagine something closer to these Devilish Apple Pie Tacos. These tacos bring all that sugary goodness of the original, lock it away in some fried tortillas and then get covered with three types of cream (yep, they'll need some of that vegan magic to make them kosher). That sounds more like it.

Click (Food): Meat Extremists, Brooklyn Does Vegan Pizza, Link Eats Berries and Tigernut Flour

Happenings:

• The patrons at a Georgian (the country, not the state) vegan cafe were pelted with fish, sausage and other meat hunks by a group of meat "extremists." The disturbance carried over into the streets where one of the neighbors came out wielding a knife. He charged the cafe with breaking his peace of "watching TV and eating sunflower seeds."

• So I guess Starbucks' has this secret "pink drink" that is totally breaking Instagram and ruling the world right now. Unlike their fall drink that rules the world with a dairy filled fist, this pink drink can actually be made vegan. Just sub in some coconut milk. The drink is so top secret that I found out about it on Cosmopolitan's website. Yes, the Cosmopolitan that has a circulation of some 3 million subscribers (circa 2011). People use the word secret so loosely nowadays. 

• Screamer's Pizzaria, Brooklyn's first completely vegan pizzeria, is open for business. As all the commenters point out, if you are looking for authentic New York style pizza, don't go here. Daiya is neither authentic nor made in New York.

• There is a vegan lifestyle show coming to a television near you. Of course, if you happen to watch it, you probably aren't a true vegan. Vegan televisions anyone?

• There is a new Zelda game hitting the market soon, Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild. The game offers hardcore vegans a chance to make lead character Link follow in their footsteps. That's right, you can choose a vegan version of Link. Instead of hunting furry little creatures to restore his health, Link will forage for mushrooms, plants and nuts. A more health conscience Link, I like it. Of course, you can't appease everyone.

• Beyond Meat has created a vegan burger that bleeds when you cook it. This is a total game changer. I mean pretty soon waiters and waitresses at vegan restaurants aren't going to have it so easy. They'll actually have to ask me how I want my burger cooked.

• Rob Zombie recently lent his voice to an episode of Mr. Pickles on Adult Swim. He was, as he put it, the "douchebag leader of a vegan cult." Don't worry about authenticity. I gave him some pretty swell pointers about what it is like being a "douchebag leader of a vegan cult." *What do you want, I'm trying to writing? You interrupted me for that? Go out and find some carrots and make a house salad sacrifice to me. And this time don't forget the vegan mustard dressing.

• An LA vegan restaurant has started serving marijuana-infused cocktails. I'd imagine that post drink food sales have probably shot through the roof. 

Recipes:

Carrot Cake Doughnut by Purely Twins

What in the bloody f*** is Tigernut flour? Oh, there's a link? Sorry, I was too lazy to click on it. Probably that marijuana-infused cocktail I had earlier.

Kale Ice Cream by Vogue

In the description for this ice cream the author states: "Here, she shares her exclusive recipe for Kale Cookies ’n’ Cream Ice Cream—sure to win over any crowd, young or old." I'm going to have to go ahead and disagree. I asked my entire family, via Facebook, if they would be in to such a thing. They all immediately unfriended me.

Lilac Dream Cheesecake from Unconventional Baker

When it comes to eating flowers as a dessert, I feel that lavender is king. The role of queen, prince and court jester are still up for grabs. Where will you fall Lilac Dream Cheesecake?

Fettuccine with Tomato Cream Sauce and Asparagus from Vegan Richa

Enough with the sweets, let's get to some savory joints. Before becoming vegan I made a mad asparagus, artichoke and white bean pasta with pesto on it. I used to miss it hardcore. Recently, I felt I had done a nice job of putting that dish behind me. But then Vegan Richa comes along and, not only tears of the band-aid, but adds an additional gash right below my jugular. It's going to be a rough night.

Cook: Vegan Blueberry Lime Donuts

On Friday I listened to Eddie and imagined eating some donuts. On Saturday I experienced half of one of Lolly's finest government conspiracies (the other half played out while I was sleeping). Those two nights merged into one crazy ass Saturday night couch dream. 

I don't want to bore you with entire storyline, so let me just summarize by saying Eddie Vedder joins forces with Michael Vale to figure out why aquafaba isn't more well known. At the end of the dream Vale and Vedder (or VV) are on stage bringing aquafaba's magic to the masses through a hit pop song they call "Aqua Faba." The lyrics went like this:   

Sheets of empty donuts, untouched sheets of dough.

Aquafaba spread out before me as her body once did.
All five metal whisks revolved around the bowl as the earth to the sun
Now the air I tasted and breathed has sweetened a bit
Ooh, and all she taught me was everything
Ooh, I know she gave me vegan donuts

As soon as I awoke on Sunday I set to work mimicking A Saucy Kitchen's aquafaba donut masterpieces. I didn't have the gluten free flours to mess around with so I did mine gluten full. For the original, gluten free version, go here. Here's how mine happened:

Vegan Blueberry Lime Donuts (adapted slightly from A Saucy Kitchen)
(printable version)

For the donuts:
-1 1/2 cup all purpose flour (210 grams)
-2 teaspoons baking powder
-1/2 cup sugar
-1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
-1/2 teaspoon nutmeg
-1/4 teaspoon salt
-6 tablespoons aquafaba (the bean juice that you drain out of a chickpea can)
-1/2 cup dairy free vanilla milk (I used So Delicious Coconut Sweetened Vanilla)
-1/4 cup coconut oil, melted

For the Glaze:
-1/2 cup blueberries fresh or frozen
-juice of one lime
-1 cup powdered sugar

1. Preheat the oven to 350°F.

2. In a medium sized bowl add you flour, baking powder, sugar, cinnamon, nutmeg, and salt. Whisk everything together until it is well mixed. Set aside.

3. In the bowl of your stand mixer, pour your aquafaba and beat on high for 2 minutes. You want the aquafaba to be frothy and its color should now be white. Add the milk and coconut oil to the stand mixer bowl as well. Beat for an additional minute on high.

4. Pour the aquafaba mixture into your bowl of dry ingredients. Stir a few times. Pour this mixture back into the bowl of your stand mixer and mix on low speed until you have a batter.

5. Spoon your batter into a ziplock bag. Cut off the corner. Squeeze it into your donut moulds. Bake for 15-18 minutes or until the donuts are cooked through.

6. Allow the donuts to cool. While they are cooling, make the glaze.

7. Microwave the blueberries for two minutes. Pour the heated berries into a food processor and process until they are smooth. Squeeze in the lime juice and pour in the powdered sugar. Continue mixing with the processor until there are no lumps. Spoon the glaze over the cooled donuts. Eat them!

Listen to these donuts here.

Cook: Dark Chocolate Granola Bark

It was early, way earlier than normal, when I pulled out of my apartment complex and got stuck behind a garbage crew. At three different stops I watched the man in charge of collecting the garbage, disembark from the back of the truck, grab a bag of garbage and toss the bag in the compacter. This whole sequence occurred in one fluid motion. At the fourth collection area the man's movements changed. He left the truck and was no longer on cruise control. He seemed focused on something off in the distance. I followed his gaze and saw a man, dressed in running garb, standing between two teenagers. It seemed to be some sort of pre-dawn marriage ceremony. The garbage man came upon the trio and, without hesitation, grabbed the running man and tore off his arms. He then proceeded to decapitate him. 

I've got two thoughts about what I witnessed this morning.  First, I've been watching too much of the new X-Files. Second, this garbage man couldn't have played the role of Emperor Claudius better if he tried. Emperor Claudius is the evil villain in one of the martyrdom stories that are generally associated with the Christian saint Valentinus (for whom Valentine's Day is named). I'm normally not one for celebrating Valentine's Day but after witnessing a guy be decapitated, how can you not feel the love? So, instead of abstaining from my work's Valentine's Party, I decided to do what's right and veganize the f**king thing. My approach? A batch of Dark Chocolate Granola Bark. 

Dark Chocolate Granola Bark

(printable version)

-2 cups vegan chocolate chips

-1 cup granola

-1/2 to 3/4 a cup of dried, tart cherries

-1/4 tsp. of coarse salt

1. Melt the chocolate in a double broiler. Remove the melted chocolate from the heat and stir in the granola. Continue until the chocolate and granola are well combined.

2. Line a baking sheet with parchment paper. Scrap the granola/chocolate mixture onto the parchment paper. Smooth the mixture to your desired thickness.

3. Uniformly sprinkle the cherries and salt on top. Press the cherries into the chocolate. Place the baking sheet in the freezer for at least half an hour. Eat with your favorite Valentine.

Artist's Cookbook: What's Cooking with Meresha?

"i saw you before i met you you were always picking flowers (vegan food from my garbage) you said you could see the world through a magnifying glass"
-"My Love Has Come" by Meresha (creepy garbage digging update by Tender Branson)

Little known fact about me: I didn't become a vegan to help save the animals that were being eaten and abused by the meat industry. I also didn't become a vegan for environmental or health reasons. I became a vegan because I was perusing through some garbage cans looking for free meals and I came across the one belonging to Florida (via Poland, Boston, and the rest of the World) musician Meresha. I tasted some of what she had discarded and I thought hmmm..... if it tastes that good after stagnating and discoloring for days, I can't even imagine how sweet it must be fresh from the oven. So I made the switch to an all vegan diet.

Here we are, years later, and I'm still going strong (as a vegan, not as a dumpster diver in Meresha's garbage). So is Meresha. She is prepping for the official release of her new single "My Love Has Come," a follow up to her highly successful "New Revolution" which charted and spent some time hanging out with the likes of Adele and Bieber. What makes Meresha's new release such a fantastic track is the way she delivers it. "My Love Has Come" is presented as a low key, one-sided conversation between the artist and a memory of her former fancy. The lyrics call on images of light and dreams, growing and burning all those who come too close. Simultaneously they are able to evoke feelings of love, sadness and a faint bit of optimism and wonder. To craft a comparison that a third grader might connect with, the lyrics are like the tiny flicker of a distant star in an otherwise pitch-black night. Meresha pumps and pushes her vocals front and center. She props them up with a bed of tropically influenced storm pop. When lyrics and music and production mold together as one, they seem to inspire images of colors, like a low burning neon sign, with crisp outlines around the edge. In short, "My Love Has Come" is a lonely walk through the darkened streets of the city with only your thoughts and a distant solitary star to keep you company.

What does one cook up with a track such as this? Meresha suggests a double dose: one to represent the songs dark side and one to connect with its low burning neon heat. First, bring the dark with her chocolatey vegan brownies. When you are through with them, bring the neon heat with her vegan fruit and veggie curry. You could always reverse course as well, but eating dessert first keeps the slow burn in focus for a much longer period of time.

Vegan in Tampa: Brunch Collaboration (#2) Between Cafe Hey and the Blind Tiger Cafe

On Sunday Cafe Hey and the Blind Tiger Cafe joined forces for their third brunch collaboration (and second in as many months). While I had dreams of driving all the way to St. Pete to find a vegan grilled cheese, I decided to put those on hold for another week and opted for the much shorter trek to Ybor. I was super stoked to see that Cafe Hey's portion of the brunch menu, the food, would be different this time around. I like my brunches with some foodie variety. I was also pretty excited to know that Blind Tiger's portion, the coffee, would be the same. A good scientist knows, you can't change everything at once.

This month's menu included waffles with fresh berries, sausage and tofu scramble with bacon bits.  There was one food similarity between last month and this one, the creamy grits with mushroom gravy. Neither J-Fur or I complained about keeping those around. We both attacked them first.

        Full View of the Brunch Plate

Holy (insert any expletive you can imagine here)! Cafe Hey's vegan waffles were the best waffles that I've ever eaten. Now, I know that might not be saying much. I've only eaten waffles at IHOP, out of my freezer/toaster, Denny's and at the free breakfast offered by hotels. Still, I'd like to think I know a thing or two about good food. What I liked about these waffles were that they were extremely silky the whole way through. There was no crisp exterior, soft interior (like the frozen ones that come from my oven). It was one consistent texture from the first bite to the last. The waffles were finished with syrup and fresh blueberries and strawberries.

                   The Sausage

The next thing to visit my stomach was the homemade vegan sausage. These had a pretty similar texture to most other vegan sausages I've eaten or made. I did like that they left a lingering taste of sage in your mouth. I found myself dipping them in the mushroom gravy as the light meatiness of the mushrooms were right at home with the earthy sage. 

     The Scrambled Tofu and Bacon Bits

Bacon and eggs anyone? I liked the texture combination created by the soft tofu and the crunchy bacon bits. Taste wise, the scrambled tofu stacked up to pretty much any previous version I've had. In fact, I liked it better than most of them because it wasn't overwhelmingly flavored with cumin.

I complained a bit last month about the price. This time around I had no such qualms. It still cost 20 dollars but my plate was full of food. When I left the cafe, I was stuffed. I stayed that way well into the evening. 

Normally being vegan in Tampa is not super cool. The Blind Tiger and Cafe Hey have decided that at least for one Sunday a month they are going to change that. I can't thank them enough.

Brittany Jean and Will Copps were bandmates who were dealt a difficult situation. They were forced to move 4,000 miles apart. Nobody would blame the two of them if they just let things end there. But they didn't. Instead they used the time apart to discover their true sound together. The recipe goes something like this: take Brittany’s raw, soulful songwriting and combine it with Will's lush, electronic atmospheres. The resulting cookbook? Heliograph by Wall of Trophies. The first single from Heliograph is the self-titled "Heliograph." It's magical silkiness pairs perfectly with a brunch centered around silky waffles.

Merry Listmas 2015: The Food

Before the calendar turns to 2016, let’s reminisce about the finer things that food in 2015 had to offer (click on the picture for recipes and blog posts).

Favorite Sandwiches:



Main Attractions




Favorite Bread Recipes



Favorite Sides



Favorite Salads




Some Other Favorites of the Year:

Favorite I Feel Like a Drinker Drink (Minus the Morning Hangover)
Kombucha. 2015 seemed to be the year of Kombucha (as far as I'm concerned) as all the cool hangouts started selling this fermented tea drink. I drank myself a glass (or bottle) at The Blind Tiger, Kaleisia, Cider Press Cafe, Tampa Bay Veg Fest, Crave and Co. and Market on South. I even experienced a homemade batch courtesy of my friend Bob. Throughout the year I repeatedly found myself enjoying the SCOBY culture created by local brewers Mother and Humble Bumble kombucha.

Best Coffee Class, Coffee Drink and Vegan Brunch Hosting
The Blind Tiger Cafe. In case you couldn't tell, I spent a lot of time there this year.

Best Craft Coffee Bean Roaster:
Buddy Brew. Not only can you choose from a variety of different flavors but you can also talk to someone who knows what the hell they are doing. It has helped me make a much better coffee at home.

Best Holiday Themed Coffee/Drink
Cornerstone Coffee. From their gingerbread chai with coconut milk to their peppermint mocha with cashew milk, I've enjoyed everything I've put my lips around at Cornerstone Coffee. Well, except that one thing...

Best Vegan Dessert
Sweet Action Ice Cream. I had a chance to return to Denver this year. Number three on my list of places to visit was Sweet Action Ice Cream. There product was as creamy and dreamy as I remembered. The only downside, no fruit flavor when we strolled through town. I had to "settle" for a pumpkin dish. If all settling was this good, well, s*** I'd "settle" daily.

Best Vegan Brunch and Burger (outside of the Tampa Bay Area)
City O' City (Denver). Any place that serves savory waffles topped with vegan cheese and green chili is a-ok in my book. Throw in a vegan burger that makes the Big Mac look like a midget and you've got a place that is worthy of traveling long distances for.

Best Vegan Brunch (in the Tampa Bay Area):
Cafe Hey. It certainly ain't cheap, but it is definitely a delight.

Best Vegan Cupcakes in Tampa:
Vegg'd Out Vegan Kitchen. Not sure where this crew is going to set up shop next but I hope they get to it sooner rather than later. Their cupcakes are on point.

Best Cuban Bread:
La Segunda Central. Actual palm fronds on top tell me all I need to know about this bread. Throw in the fact that it doesn't cost an arm and a leg and I wander why anyone would buy from anywhere else.

Best Appetizer:
Datz's Buffalo Cauliflower. An entire head that is served with a knife sticking out of it. Get it during half price app hour and you will definitely feel like you got your money's worth.

Best Fried Yucca
Las Palmas Cafe

Best Sandwich
The Local House's Fried Green Tomato Sandwich.

Best Snack Bar:
Kind bars. You guys showed up almost everywhere and I enjoyed every moment of it. The fact that you are such a customer driven company is the chocolate drizzle on the granola bar.

Best Bread I Can't Buy In Stores
Jamison B. Breadhouse Bakes. I smell your bread baking in Ybor, I have eaten it at The Local Public House & Provisions yet I can't purchase it because you only do wholesale. So, so sad. Thank God I got that new violin for Christmas.

Best You Can Buy Vegan Food Here(?) Bar: 
Stage Left.

Best Corporate Chain Store Vegan Meatballs:
Ikea baby. Their constant pushing of the envelope resulted in vegan meatballs being added to their stores menu. Just another reason they are poised to take over the world (if they haven't already done so).

Most Inventive Vegetarian Sushi Line
Takara Sushi. I wasn't super impressed during my first visit to Takara, mainly because they didn't have a lot of vegetarian sushi to offer. The owner insisted, via Yelp, that his crew was in the process of coming up with a vegetarian sushi line. I made a return trip there this year to try it out (and then another and another). Not only did they make an entire line of vegetarian sushi but they got inventive with it. They didn't just go with the simple, mundane rolls that you can get anywhere. These flavor combinations seemed like they were crafted by people who actually care about vegetables, not just thrown together as an accompaniment to raw fish.

Best Bowl (and food truck)
Give and Grub

Vegan Restaurant of the Year
Market on South. When J-Fur and I travel anywhere, long before we leave the plane/car/boat and set foot on foreign soil, I already have a pretty good idea where I want to eat. That's what makes the fact that we accidentally (read luckily) wound up at my favorite vegan restaurant of 2015 pretty remarkable. When I arrived in Orlando for a weekend stay, I had no idea that Market on South existed. But thanks to a tip by an employee at a disappointing coffee shop, I showed up there. I didn't expect much (that's how disappointing that coffee shop was). What I got was beyond my wildest dreams. What I love about Market on South is that it is a joint venture by three independent businesses, something that you don't see too often in the business world. The restaurant has a total DIY/punk/mainstream f*** off feel to it. But attitude and independence is one thing, delivering the goods is something completely different. All three business partners (Valhalla Bakery, Humble Bumble Kombucha and Dixie Dharma) deliver. Whether you are enjoying the amazing Fried Green Tomato Sandwich, Cheezy Potatoes and Brussels Sprouts dished out by Dixie Dharma or the out of this world Lavender and Vanilla Bean Yolo baked up by Valhalla Bakery or the light and refreshing Citron Kombucha brewed by Humble Bumble, Market on South will not disappoint. That's because these vendors put taste, quality, plant-based and dairy-free first and foremost on their agenda. That's why Market on South is my vegan restaurant of the year.

Click (Food): Jesse Eisenberg's Thanksliving, Football Players Need Their Protein, Speak Vegan in Any Language, Pumpkin Tots and a Sticky Bun Crown

Happy Thanksgiving! Here's what caught my eye in the land of food and agave leading up to this gluttonous holiday:

Happenings:

• Just in time for New Year's Eve, Duval-Leroy Champagne has announced that it's product is now completely vegan. Now more casein, gelatin or egg whites needed to fine the process, instead they just let it sit for an additional three months. I thought this simple solution would work on other things so I decided to try making meringue from vegan egg replacers again. I beat them vigorously for a bit and then let them sit for three months. My final product was definitely more solid than previous attempts. Unfortunately it was also more discolored and more attractive to the flies that were circulating around it. 

• So I am on a bus traveling to the airport the other day and these two fifty something, overweight men and their ladies were discussing football. Naturally Arian Foster comes up and all his injury problems. One of the guys says it is because he is "vegan." The lady who was not married to him suggested that it should be a requirement for all macho men, like football players, to eat meat. Get your protein boys! I'm wondering if she'd make that same statement staring down the barrel of whatever these men and women are packing. Go ahead lady, tell them they're soft. I dare you...

• My worst nightmare of the last three years featured me, stuck in Sri Lanka, surrounded by a bunch of bloody meat carcasses. A woman comes and serves me one of those nasty pieces of flesh. I try to tell her I'm vegan but I can't get the words out because I don't speak her language. Have no fear people, this nightmare will not be coming to a dream state near you. Thanks to the veganagogo app, we can all speak vegan in whatever language we need.


• Jesse Eisenberg's family just became the coolest ones on the block (not my block, of course, I reside in a much lower income area than they probably do). They celebrate Thanksliving instead of Thanksgiving, eat completely vegan and post pictures of the turkeys they saved by eating tofu? Sign me up.

• Oh lord, Vegan "extremists" petitioned Wal-Mart to stop selling toy livestock trailers. The Pork Network doesn't like it.

• I thought my two cups of water a day was minimal. This guy hasn't drank a glass of water since 2012.

Recipes:

Ginger Pumpkin Tart with Maple-Pecan Crust by Oh Ladycakes

Uncle Ned has celiac disease, Cousin Dagger is dairy intolerant, you are just so over the whole traditional pumpkin pie thing and your mother approaches you about making this year's family dessert. What are you going to do? Oh Ladycakes has the answer. Spice up that traditional pumpkin pie with some ginger and then plop it on a maple-pecan crust. Uncle Ned and Cousin Dagger will both be on board because this dessert is vegan and gluten free. Who knew that satisfying your family could be so damn easy?

Vegan Sticky Bun Crown by Emmy Lous Kitchen

There was this sportswriter for the Philly Inquirer who used to begin his Sunday articles with the line "When I'm king of the world...". He would then fill in his thoughts about what happened that week/night/day in sports. They were pretty boring reads, I usually skipped over the meat of his stuff, but I noticed enough to get the gist of what he was trying to do. That beginning line popped into my head when I saw these Sticky Bun Crowns from Emmy Lous Kitchen. Because when I'm king of the world, I want to wear a crown made of sticky buns. And when I feel the urge, I want to eat that crown. Then I want someone to bring me another. That sounds just about perfect. For those of you who aren't kings of the world (hey, there can only be one of us) maybe try these out for Thanksgiving morning. It'll make you feel a bit royal before dashing to the kitchen for a seven hour cook fest.

Vegan Mini Pot Pie Jars from the Colorful Kitchen

I'm a big fan of pies in a jar. Those little desserts seem to have just the right mixture of crust to filling and are already packed in single servings. They are super easy to freeze so that you can have fresh pie anytime of year. I never even contemplated that the same pie in the jar treatment could be given to a savory version like a pot pie. The Colorful Kitchen showed me that not only can they get that same treatment but they can also be topped with those criss cross pieces of dough that look so fancy. In hopes that I don't miss out on something so spectacular again, I've been sitting here generating a list of all the pies that I can think of and deciding whether or not they would work in a jar. So far, here's what I have: Magpie, Cowpie, Pieface

Not having much luck.

Homemade Pumpkin Tots from Savory Nothings

Never in my life did I utter the phrase "Man I wish I had some pumpkin that was cooked like a tater tot right now." I did come close, once, when I told a lady at the store, "Man I wish I had some vegan cherry turnovers right now." Yeah, once I said it out loud I realized how not close it actually was.

Enjoy your holiday! 

Cook: Apple-Walnut Salad With Popped Quinoa and Maple-Balsamic Vinaigrette

I'm walking around Denver this weekend, cold as f*** because I forgot to bring a damn winter jacket, and I spot this thrift shop. I duck inside trying to muster up the cajones to actually eat ice cream in 40 degree weather. I mean normally I'd pass, but this is vegan ice cream at its creamiest and dreamiest and I have no idea when I'll be returning to Denver so I gotta roll with it while I can. I start walking the aisles of this thrift shop and quickly realize it is like no other thrift shop I've ever visited (from here on out I will refer to it as a "thrift shop" with the quotes signifying my extreme skepticism of its legitness). There were designer jeans that still had the tags on them, hand knitted taxidermic animals hanging from the walls, clothes WITHOUT STAINS on them and plates that didn't look like they came from a recently deceased older couple. To go along with the product, the prices, phew, those were simply outrageous. I could get stuff cheaper from Target than I could here. That definitely does not fit my definition of a "thrift shop."

Somewhere around the heirloom quinoa (food? and they call this a "thrift shop"), Macklemore came into my head and I seriously thought about, amongst other things, popping some tags. Let's take a trip into my brain to see just how it all played out... *thought bubbles float by* Heirloom quinoa? What kind of human hating savage donates that to a "thrift shop?" And why doesn't my local grocer carry some of that? I totally should just pop it but it is located right next to the cashier with the big eyes. And she keeps staring at me. I think she sees me eyeing the quinoa and knows what I'm thinking. Wait. Backup. Did I suggest popping quinoa? That's f**king brilliant man. Not only are you good looking, but you are so super...*thought bubble float away* Well, that's enough of that. The "thrift shop" experience did lead me to popping some quinoa and throwing it on a salad. So there's that.

Apple-Walnut Salad with Popped Quinoa and Maple-Balsamic Vinaigrette

(printable version)

For the salad:

-Granny Smith Apple, sliced thinly

-1/4 cup of walnuts, crushed

-6 ounces of mixed greens

-4 Tbs. of quinoa rinsed

For the dressing:

-1/4 cup of olive oil (the good stuff)

-2 tsp. balsamic vinegar

-1 tsp. Dijon mustard

-1 Tbs. maple syrup

-salt and pepper (to taste)

1. To pop the quinoa: heat a pan with a lid over medium high heat. When the pan is warm, toss a tablespoon of rinsed and dried quinoa into the pan and place the lid on top. When it starts popping, that means the pan is ready. All the quinoa to pop. When it slows down, just like with popcorn, remove it from the heat and set aside. Place the remaining quinoa into the pan and repeat the popping process.

2. Combine all the ingredients for the dressing in a glass jar with a lid. Shake that baby until it is mixed.

3. Place the greens on a plate (or two or three). Top them with apples and crushed walnuts. Sprinkle the popped quinoa overtop. Pour the dressing on. Eat it.

If you navigate the popping at just the right angle, this salad sounds like...

Click (Food): Human DNA in Hot Dogs, Strip Clubs That Become Homeless Shelters, Guinness Stops Using Fish Bladders and the Forest Green Rovers Football Club Goes Vegan

We've got entire football clubs pledging to follow the vegan lifestyle, a formerly vegan strip club that is now in the process of becoming a homeless shelter, a restaurant owner threatening to shoot any vegan that walks into his establishment and human DNA showing up in hot dogs. Yep, just a normal few weeks in the crazy world of food. Here are those stories...and a few others:

Happenings:

• The building that used to house Johnny Diablo's Black Cauldron, a vegan Strip club in Portland, is being transitioned to a 24-hour homeless shelter. I asked J-Fur what kind of funny joke I could make about this news. She said "Nothing."

• Quorn, the fake meat line that is made up of fermented mycoprotein, is set to release a vegan product line in the US in early 2016. Another total win for the vegan test tube food lovers out there.

• The Forest Green Rovers have become the "world's first vegan football club." Who are they? They are a team in the English fifth tier level. I think that is only a step or two higher than my high school team. Still, it is cool to think that if I'm ever in Nailsworth, Gloucestershire I can have a completely vegan football experience.


• Just because you are vegan, doesn't mean you can't enjoy some halloween candies. Here is a list of vegan safe halloween candies. Just remember to check the wrapper to make sure it wasn't fiddled with. You never know if one of your pro-beef neighbors might have tried to sneak some of their carcinogenic animal juices into your candy. Psshh, jealous much?

• A Facebook battle between vegans and Dublin's White Moose Cafe broke out this week. It escalated to the point that the owner finally decreed "Any Vegans attempting to enter our cafe will be shot dead at point blank range." A quick flight on Thursday told me that he is all bark and no bite. Not only did he not shoot me dead, he actually took the eggs, Parmesan and Hollandaise Sauce off of his grilled asparagus salad and served me a vegan version. He called it...Asparagus.

• A Vegan Culinary Academy is set to open in Florida. Of course it can't be somewhere close by like Tampa, St. Petersburg or Orlando so I can take night classes. Instead, it is way down in Miami. I guess my only option is weekend classes. The cool thing about weekend classes is that it exponentially increased the likelihood that I run into Kim Kardashian.

• The vegan beer drinking crowd goes wild as Guinness has promised to stop filtering their beer with fish bladders. That means it is now 100 percent vegan. My famous Vegan Irish Stew thanks you. 

• Tough week for meat eaters. First they found out that their hot dogs contain bits of human DNA. Then they found out that meat most meat is probably carcinogenic (while processed meat definitely causes cancer). I just sat there pointing my finger and laughing at all those silly meat eaters while I chowed down on a vegan hot dog. Wait...what? Oh shit!

Recipes:

Pumpkin Muffins With Pecan Streusel and Maple Glaze by Show Me the Yummy

My favorite muffins have always been the ones covered with streusel. It doesn't matter if it is blueberry, banana, strawberry or apple, just cover that shit in streusel and watch me sing. Show Me the Yummy ups the ante quite a bit with their version. Not only is there's pumpkiny and streusely but they make it all glazey as well. I imagine Trevor and Jennifer, the duo behind Show Me the Yummy, came up with the recipe while sitting at a poker table playing foodie poker against the likes of corporate entities such as Whole Foods, Dunkin Donuts and Panera. All three of those losers throw their streusel muffins in the pot and sit back with a laugh. We've got you their non poker faces seem to say. Trevor and Jennifer don't say a word as they reach into their bag and pull out this muffin. "Is that pumpkin?" Whole Foods asks. "That can't be streusel" Dunkin Donuts exclaims. "We'll fu** me," Panera gasps "you've got maple glaze." All three stand up without another word. They know they've been defeated.

Vegan Tiramisu by Crazy Vegan Kitchen

Thanks to Crazy Vegan Kitchen "there's (vegan) layers to this shit player, tiramisu, tiramisu." 

Lentil Burger from Contentedness Cooking

It wasn't the lentil burger that attracted me to this recipe, those are like a dime a dozen. It was that sweet, oozing mustard sauce. Any recipe with something so glorious, so runny, so yellow deserves my attention. Go away eggs, I'm not talking to you.

Vegan Cinnamon Rolls with Apples from Vegan Heaven

Oh Sina. Sina, Sina, Sina. As she shares this recipe on her blog, Sina starts with a line about her grandma's cinnamon rolls and how unfortunate it is that she doesn't live close to her anymore. It made me think about my own grandmother. She passed a few years ago. The crazy thing is, despite her passing, I can still enjoy her cinnamon rolls anytime I want to. Unfortunately, they aren't vegan. Sina then goes on to talk about how her favorite bakery, which isn't far from her home, serves up vegan cinnamon rolls. I too have a favorite bakery that serves vegan cinnamon rolls. A quick check on Google Maps says that it is only 1,091 miles away (with tolls). If I want to go the cheap no tolls route it is only 40 miles farther. All of this is to say that I need Sina's recipe a lot more than she probably needs it.