Cook: Sweet Corn and Green Chili Flautas

So I'm watching this election sh*t from a safe distance, like some rubbernecker two lanes over from all the chaos. I don't think I've ever seen such a train wreck. Neither candidate seems to be able to garner any likes on their pictures, both appear to be in the business of gathering you hate me the least votes.

During my rubbernecking last week I came across video from a Donald Trump rally in Arizona, a state well known for making some good tortilla recipes (well, at least that is what my wife says, I've never actually been there). At this rally, a white supremacist bro Trump supporter goes absolutely apesh*t on a Hispanic protester. He screamed things like: “Get the f*ck out of here — our country, motherf*cker, our country" and “Proud f*cking American! Made in USA bitch, made in f*cking USA!” Then, showing that the Arizona state flag that is tattooed on his back is more than just show, he drops a tortilla body slam on the man: “Go f*cking make my tortilla, motherf*cker,” (fresh with some sort of salute).

I gotta say, Trump's whole make America great again thing seems like some sort of Pandora's box. People have these racist, sexist feelings boiling inside but the latest version of America does not approve. So, they've hidden it (except for on anonymous message boards and amongst their like-minded companions). But Trump's run for presidency has made these people feel that it is okay to put that stuff out there again. I'm not sure it ever gets boxed again, no matter what the outcome of this election is.

Anyway, Wednesday night when J-Fur got home from work she was real hangry and she ordered me to "Go f*cking make my tortilla, mother*cker." So I cooked up these Sweet Corn and Green Chili Flautas from Thug Kitchen. I slightly altered things because I didn't have any canned chilis and I had a bunch of refried black beans. So I mashed the black beans and pinto beans together and left the chilis out.

It only took two bites and I was beating my chest screaming "This dish! This is what makes America great. Not whatever that Trump bro is dishing out!" J-Fur ageed.

Soundtrack this dish like this.

Food Pairing 101: What Goes Well With "Gone" by Day Wave?

Imagine yourself at an Italian restaurant. I'm not talking the fine dining sort of Italian, more like the greasy red and white checkerboard hole-in-the-wall place. The man behind the counter doesn't even take your order, he just sort of waves you off, and brings out this gigantic calzone. You have no idea exactly what is inside this family sized hot pocket. You think you do, you've eaten enough calzones to know they generally follow some rules with what they put inside, but there's always the chance that this place has taken tradition and turned it on its head.

Day Wave's new single "Gone" is sort of like that calzone. Because Day Wave's name is attached to the track, you might have this idea that the song will be loaded with lo-fi vocals and warm spacey music. But then you hear him start off with the line "You think I'm still the same in every single way, but I changed" and all of a sudden it dawns on you. 2015 is gone. The Day Wave that we fell in love with last year has evolved, albeit slightly, into something new.

"Gone," the first glimpse at Day Wave's new EP Hard to Read (due out March 5th via Grand Jury/Fat Possum) is lusher and more ethereal than some of his previous work. This has a lot to do with how he arranges the synths. The track embraces the warm sunshine in a similar way to it's predecessors, but there is also a bit of darkness, like a calzone baked and placed in the window to cool while a mid-day summer storm approaches on the horizon. Day Wave's dialing back of the lo-fi vocal effect helps him move towards this darkness. His feelings of loneliness and being misunderstood are no longer buried beneath layers and layers of vocal effect and sounds. They are now more out in the open for others to hear.

So what does one pair with an evolving Day Wave and his new, lusher, slightly darkened, summery song? A calzone of course. My calzone of choice would be the spinach and cheese version featured in the Ultimate Uncheese Cookbook by Joanne Stepaniak. The light/dark balance is created by the tofu and spinach that line the inside of the dough. Also in there is a sesame seed based vegan parmesan. Nothing symbolizes being misunderstood quite like sesame seeds that pose as parmesan. The whole wheat dough pays homage to what has come before but it is also slightly new and updated. It also does a nice job of hiding what is inside.

Eat a calzone. Listen to "Gone":

Cook: The Mac Shroom

Lady Gaga once compared jet lag to a bad batch of shrooms. To that I laugh and say “Gee, it must be nice to suffer from jet lag.” I mean some of us here in the middle class can’t afford to fly our wives, dogs, skis, guns, golf clubs and luggage north for the holidays. So we make a sixteen-hour drive instead. Give me jet lag any day over that.

Our latest version of the trip was especially harrowing because I drove for 13 hours straight, losing my MP3 player halfway thru, and I only had a five song EP (Frightened Rabbit’s State Hospital) to listen to. No matter how good a five-song album is (and I do enjoy FR’s) you can’t take six hours of it. I know, I tried. Yes Lady Gaga, that is the stuff ‘shroom nightmares are made of.

We stumbled in the door sometime around 9 o’clock at night. The spiders on the ceilings and floating baby dinosaurs forced me to sit for a few moments and rest my eyes. When the bad trip seemed to be over I headed to my stash of holiday gifts and pulled out one of my new cookbooks Vegan Sandwiches Save the Day. I didn’t know what I was looking for, possibly a good case of the
‘shrooms to wipe away the bad or maybe just something to share with the baby dinosaurs. What immediately jumped out at me was the Mac-Shroom. This wiley creature consisted of homemade barbeque sauce, Mac and Cheeze and portobello all layered on a burger bun. I made some slight alterations as I couldn’t fathom eating another piece of bread (I basically lived off that stuff in Pennsylvania) and my energy had long since disappeared so homemade barbeque sauce was not going to be on the menu. Instead of bread, I laid down a grilled portobello, topped it with a tomato and a pile of Mac and Cheeze and then finished it with some store bought barbeque sauce.

It wasn’t as fabulous as I hoped (the tomato should’ve been cut up and placed in the Mac and Cheese instead of isolated below it and I’m sure the homemade barbeque sauce makes a world of difference) but it still pleased both the dinosaurs and myself. The spiders refused to come down and try any. I will definitely be giving this another go, with no body modifications. I can’t wait to try out some of the other recipes as well (the Jimwich and Chow Mein sandwich are both calling my name).

Hear this sandwich in song form.