Monday, June 27, 2016

Food Flavored Song: Sweet Disaster by DREAMERS

Tonight, you're on top of the world, the king (or queen) of some late night, neon loaded, kingdom of debauchery. Across from you is the person of your moment, the one who puts nothing but bad things into your mind when they are around. Each new destination, on this fine evening, means a different jukebox to control. You've spent time with the Ramones, the Rolling Stones and a sea of others whom you can no longer recollect. As the two of you step outside and watch the final bar close its door and shut off the lights, you lean in for your goodbyes. Despite the fact that you are both swimming "in a river of champagne," a quick glance shows that you are both on the same page when it comes to this night. While "some nights feel like every night, this one feels brand new."

This is the playful picture painted in DREAMERS' joyful new single "Sweet Disaster." The upbeat tone is amazing considering that this song, and the others on the band's upcoming debut LP This Album Does Not Exist, was born out of homelessness, joblessness and borderline hopelessness. Failed relationships, vacated apartments, crashing in practice spaces, nomadism, cross country moves are just some of the things that the band has dealt with the past few years. While these situations play out in the lyrics of the music and the escapism theme that seems to connect the tracks, the band works hard to not let them invade the world around their songs. Instead of bringing you down with the big questions in life, DREAMERS hope to have you dance those questions away and embrace the joys that come with living.

It definitely isn't an easy task, delivering stories of pain and suffering in a jovial manner that gets people dancing in their seats, that DREAMERS are hoping to accomplish. While judgement of their success as a whole will have to be reserved for another day, "Sweet Disaster" proves that they are moving in the right direction.

Click (Food): Meat Extremists, Brooklyn Does Vegan Pizza, Link Eats Berries and Tigernut Flour

  • So I guess Starbucks' has this secret "pink drink" that is totally breaking Instagram and ruling the world right now. Unlike their fall drink that rules the world with a dairy filled fist, this pink drink can actually be made vegan. Just sub in some coconut milk. The drink is so top secret that I found out about it on Cosmopolitan's website. Yes, the Cosmopolitan that has a circulation of some 3 million subscribers (circa 2011). People use the word secret so loosely nowadays. 
  • Screamer's Pizzaria, Brooklyn's first completely vegan pizzeria, is open for business. As all the commenters point out, if you are looking for authentic New York style pizza, don't go here. Daiya is neither authentic nor made in New York.
  • There is a new Zelda game hitting the market soon, Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild. The game offers hardcore vegans a chance to make lead character Link follow in their footsteps. That's right, you can choose a vegan version of Link. Instead of hunting furry little creatures to restore his health, Link will forage for mushrooms, plants and nuts. A more health conscience Link, I like it. Of course, you can't appease everyone.
  • Beyond Meat has created a vegan burger that bleeds when you cook it. This is a total game changer. I mean pretty soon waiters and waitresses at vegan restaurants aren't going to have it so easy. They'll actually have to ask me how I want my burger cooked.
  • Rob Zombie recently lent his voice to an episode of Mr. Pickles on Adult Swim. He was, as he put it, the "douchebag leader of a vegan cult." Don't worry about authenticity. I gave him some pretty swell pointers about what it is like being a "douchebag leader of a vegan cult." *What do you want, I'm trying to writing? You interrupted me for that? Go out and find some carrots and make a house salad sacrifice to me. And this time don't forget the vegan mustard dressing.

Carrot Cake Doughnut by Purely Twins

What in the bloody f*** is Tigernut flour? Oh, there's a link? Sorry, I was too lazy to click on it. Probably that marijuana-infused cocktail I had earlier.

Kale Ice Cream by Vogue

In the description for this ice cream the author states: "Here, she shares her exclusive recipe for Kale Cookies ’n’ Cream Ice Cream—sure to win over any crowd, young or old." I'm going to have to go ahead and disagree. I asked my entire family, via Facebook, if they would be in to such a thing. They all immediately unfriended me.

Lilac Dream Cheesecake from Unconventional Baker

When it comes to eating flowers as a dessert, I feel that lavender is king. The role of queen, prince and court jester are still up for grabs. Where will you fall Lilac Dream Cheesecake?

Fettuccine with Tomato Cream Sauce and Asparagus from Vegan Richa

Enough with the sweets, let's get to some savory joints. Before becoming vegan I made a mad asparagus, artichoke and white bean pasta with pesto on it. I used to miss it hardcore. Recently, I felt I had done a nice job of putting that dish behind me. But then Vegan Richa comes along and, not only tears of the band-aid, but adds an additional gash right below my jugular. It's going to be a rough night.

Friday, June 24, 2016

Food Flavored Song: A Living Human Girl by The Regrettes

“There are times when you feel really insecure and you really don’t like yourself, so I wrote it ("A Living Human Girl") for people who feel that and I wrote it for myself. I just felt like there wasn’t a song like that out there. A song that if I was feeling super shitty about myself, that I could listen to. I wanted something that would make girls and boys feel confident.” -Lydia Night 
Lydia Night is the outspoken front woman for perfectly imperfect LA punk band the Regrettes. The band blends song writing that is both "brazen" and "unabashed" with a pop aesthetic reminiscent of 50's and 60's acts like the Temptations, Buddy Holly or any of those bubblegum pop bands that you currently can't remember the name of.

A blending like this could easily melt in ones face. I'm thinking cheese to the max. But the Regrettes totally pull it off, at least they do in their new single, "A Living Human Girl." "A Living Human Girl" deals with the notion that Lydia, and most women for that matter, aren't perfect pinup models when you get close to them. Real women will sometimes look pretty and sometimes will not. They might have small boobs and untoned stomachs. They'll get little red bumps when they shave. Basically, they'll not be perfect. Lydia's point is that not being perfect is okay. She essentially tells you everything that is wrong with her, gets the shit out of the way early, so that she doesn't have to put on some front. You know what you are getting when you hang with her. If you are okay with that, cool. If you aren't, well, hit the road because she'll find someone else who is. While the topic of "A Living Human Girl" is certainly serious (I don't know how many young girls and boys I see trying to hide their imperfections instead of embracing them and being okay with who they are) and Lydia was really angry when she penned, she doesn't scream and shout to drive home her point. She delivers it with humor, she makes you laugh and, most importantly, makes you feel better about your own imperfections.

So how's this song play in the world of food? Two ways actually. First there's a line near the beginning where Lydia says that she has "A nice full belly that is filled with food." The tastier food flavoring comes from the Regrettes press release which lists their genre "cupcake punk." Nice little sugary confections iced to punk perfection. I like it. Just like cupcakes, you could eat the Regrettes all yourself, but might I advise sharing them with a friend. You'll feel a lot better that way.

Thursday, June 23, 2016

Listen: Aqua Fab Tracks from Dive In and Ofelia K.

In a kitchen full of blueberry aquafaba donuts, here's what plays on rabbit eared stereos:

Aquafaba you say? Hmm...I could've continued to drain that sh** away. Instead I chose to save it, Dive right In and make vegan magic happen. This kind of magic is punchy, powerful and a real pop banger. It also pulls a rabbit from a hat at the exact moment that I decided to finally exit the kitchen and gift my donuts to the world. Dive In's "Rush Of The Night" shares some adjectives with the aquafaba donuts. It punches and bangs like an epic pop tune. The song does differ slightly from the recipe in that it holds a special place in the band's heart. That's because it signifies the point at which they took their music from the studio and offered it to the world. Wait? That's not a difference. Conceptually, "Rush of the Night" is about being in a situation / relationship that you know isn’t good for you and yet you find yourself unable to leave it. That's the world before aquafaba as far as I'm concerned.

LA songstress Ofelia K. describes her new song "I Love My Lawyer" as being about an unlikely, deep connection with another person. It is a song that is a sheep in wolves clothing…fun and brave, but sad and desperate underneath. I wouldn't call my donuts sheep in wolves clothing though the certainly exhibit the same sort of surface fun and core desperation. Maybe calling them garbanzo juice in an egg shell is more appropriate?

Tuesday, June 21, 2016

Cook: Vegan Blueberry Lime Donuts

On Friday I listened to Eddie and imagined eating some donuts. On Saturday I experienced half of one of Lolly's finest government conspiracies (the other half played out while I was sleeping). Those two nights merged into one crazy ass Saturday night couch dream. 

I don't want to bore you with entire storyline, so let me just summarize by saying Eddie Vedder joins forces with Michael Vale to figure out why aquafaba isn't more well known. At the end of the dream Vale and Vedder (or VV) are on stage bringing aquafaba's magic to the masses through a hit pop song they call "Aqua Faba." The lyrics went like this:   

Sheets of empty donuts, untouched sheets of dough.

Aquafaba spread out before me as her body once did.
All five metal whisks revolved around the bowl as the earth to the sun
Now the air I tasted and breathed has sweetened a bit
Ooh, and all she taught me was everything
Ooh, I know she gave me vegan donuts

As soon as I awoke on Sunday I set to work mimicking A Saucy Kitchen's aquafaba donut masterpieces. I didn't have the gluten free flours to mess around with so I did mine gluten full. For the original, gluten free version, go here. Here's how mine happened:

Vegan Blueberry Lime Donuts (adapted slightly from A Saucy Kitchen)
(printable version)

For the donuts:
-1 1/2 cup all purpose flour (210 grams)
-2 teaspoons baking powder
-1/2 cup sugar
-1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
-1/2 teaspoon nutmeg
-1/4 teaspoon salt
-6 tablespoons aquafaba (the bean juice that you drain out of a chickpea can)
-1/2 cup dairy free vanilla milk (I used So Delicious Coconut Sweetened Vanilla)
-1/4 cup coconut oil, melted

For the Glaze:
-1/2 cup blueberries fresh or frozen
-juice of one lime
-1 cup powdered sugar

1. Preheat the oven to 350°F.

2. In a medium sized bowl add you flour, baking powder, sugar, cinnamon, nutmeg, and salt. Whisk everything together until it is well mixed. Set aside.

3. In the bowl of your stand mixer, pour your aquafaba and beat on high for 2 minutes. You want the aquafaba to be frothy and its color should now be white. Add the milk and coconut oil to the stand mixer bowl as well. Beat for an additional minute on high.

4. Pour the aquafaba mixture into your bowl of dry ingredients. Stir a few times. Pour this mixture back into the bowl of your stand mixer and mix on low speed until you have a batter.

5. Spoon your batter into a ziplock bag. Cut off the corner. Squeeze it into your donut moulds. Bake for 15-18 minutes or until the donuts are cooked through.

6. Allow the donuts to cool. While they are cooling, make the glaze.

7. Microwave the blueberries for two minutes. Pour the heated berries into a food processor and process until they are smooth. Squeeze in the lime juice and pour in the powdered sugar. Continue mixing with the processor until there are no lumps. Spoon the glaze over the cooled donuts. Eat them!

Listen to these donuts here.

Sunday, June 19, 2016

Click (Music): Vodka Made from Fog, Alpha Cities, Killing Kim K. and Haux

"Roll" by Work Drugs

In 2012 Miami was determined to be an Alpha City. That means it is a city that will hump your leg if you get too close to it. It also means that it is pretty important when it comes to the global economy. "Roll" by Work Drugs was penned while on a trip to Miami last winter. Based on the lyrical content I'd have to say it was written after the band had their leg humped.

"Some Other Dude" by Everywhere

Life is all about seizing an opportunity. React too slowly and she'll be dancing with some other dude.

"Body Drop (Howl)" by KONG

One of the five songs on Kong's debut EP is about killing Kim Kardashian in order to save the boys and girls and the rest of the world. I liked the edginess of the song lyrics but didn't find the song nearly as catchy as "Body Drop (Howl)." So, in order to save the integrity of this blog (ha, ha what?) I will forgo the Google search spike I would receive by posting a song about "killing Kim Kardashian" and just stick with what's catchy. By the way, if you ended up at this blog because you searched "killing Kim Kardashian," what's wrong with you? Do you want to make her a martyr?

"Summer in the City (Living is For Someone Else)" by The Legends

Take a moment and hover over the first comment on "Summer in the City (Living is For Someone Else)" one of the two new singles by the Legends. For those of you that are blind DJ-KIK says "Not really fan sorry." That's probably the most asinine thing I've read online. Who goes to songs they don't like just to apologize for not liking them? That would be like me taking up my father's day tweeting all the hockey, baseball, basketball, football and soccer teams that I am not a fan of just to apologize for not liking them. Excuse me a second, I have to go do something. *Adds 'Tweet Teams I Am Not a Fan Of to Apologize' to Google Keep list titled Things to Do Someday When I am Extremely Bored and in a Full Body Cast With Only the Internet Within Reach.

"Seaside" by Haux

So I'm at a wedding last night. While we are waiting for the food to start arriving my pals and I get into a little competition to see who can name the most towns in England. We come up with Berkshire, where Haux hails from. One person in the group said "Isn't that a cheese company with the slogan 'it's magically delicious?'"


"Roses" by The Legends

Tender B
says at 0.05:
Not really fan sorry. I like the original just a little bit better. I'd still ride in an Uber that was playing this song, though.


"Breakin' Point" by Peter Bjorn and John

Ever see a PB&J throw sticks at a mop looking creature?

"Nowhere Now (Acoustic)" by Waterstrider

Finally, finally, finally we will have a debut album from Waterstrider. Nowhere Now is set for a mid-August release. Here is an acoustic version of the title track.

"By My Side" by The Interrupters

I don't think anything has stuck with me as long this week (other than the pain that comes with taking a machete to weeds for an hour) as "I don't wanna die, I don't wanna die, I don't wanna die, but if I do die, do die, I know you'll be by my side" has.

I should mention, the burrito from last night is trying to put up a fight....stay tuned.

"Bury It (featuring Hayley Williams of Paramore)" by Chvrches

Every time I try to "bury it and rise above" I am interrupted with a documentary about making vodka from fog. Its at the point where I am going to have a hard time hearing this song without doing a shot of Fog Point. Accidental consumerism at its foggiest.

"Rebel Yell (Billy Idol Cover)" by The Flux Machine

Bourbon Whiskey, static hypnosis and a voice run through a synthesizer.

 Get All of 2016's Click Tracks (when available) in One Spotify Playlist:

Friday, June 17, 2016

Food Pairing 101: What Goes Well With Future Generations' New Single?

The idea behind Future Generations' new single "Coast" is that there is a special girl that is looking to relocate to the coast. Lead singer Eddie Gore insists throughout the track that he doesn't want to lose this girl to the coast. Yet, he questions exactly what it is that is happening between them. I mean he knows that "it sparkles and it shines" but is it the type of thing that is "made of gold?" Or is it just that fake stuff that falls apart minutes after you pour out your soul and keep her from the coast? At that point, when she bounces to someone else, gets pregnant and becomes stuck almost as far away from Walla Walla as she can be, isn't it at least a little bit your fault? *Pardon me while I put that skeleton back in the closet.*

"Coast" is unique as far as Future Generations goes because it wasn't written as a band. The song came about when Eddie spent a few days in Nashville visiting family. He sat down for a collaborative session with his father and an amazing songwriter named Sarah Silva. According to Eddie, Ms. Silva brought out some "real emotion" in him and they wound up writing a "great song."  

So what would I pair with this track? I'm thinking something a bit fruity. More importantly, it has to have aquafaba. I say this because "Coast" winds down with a repetitive "the coast is calling your name, I don't hear a sound." Replace the word "coast" with "aquafaba" and really you describe the last few years of my life. I've heard of the wonders of aquafaba (bean juice) as an egg replacer but haven't yet gone for it. I've let it fall on deaf ears. It seems like such a hassle to deal with. But when you are turning down things like these Blueberry Lime Glazed Donuts (from A Saucy Kitchen blog) just because you are being lazy, eventually you get to the point where it comes time to reevaluate. Do you want to keep doing subpar vegan desserts? Or do you want to take it to the next level?

Nothing like "Coasts" and Blueberry Lime donuts and aquafaba reevaluation to finish off your Friday.